As much as I’d like to write about how excited I am about this documentary and how well that aspect of my trip is going, I need to touch on the struggle i am facing. Its not that i have resolved to not making an awesome documetary, but I am a bit discouraged. Everything is lining up perfectly in regards to the travel aspect of the trip. The patience of waiting for the equipment to film is driving me crazy, and as time passes doubt begins to work its way in. I have to say first and formost traveling and snowboarding is priority number one. Filming is second. I don’t want to say that it is not going to happen but I have to accept that it may not happen this year. The additional cost including film equipment, as I have figured it, is some where around $5000. That inclueds a location budget, legal needs, post production and so forth. Really its not a huge budget to work with but when added to an undetermined number in the thousands i am already putting forth it really adds up. The price of gas, food, equipment and any extras is a lot. So it may be an option to make this a two year project. To use this year for networking, skill building and concept development. To snowboard as much as possible because really its a personal journey and atthe end of the day Iam on a personal mission to find my truth. More on this later… Desire overcomes many obsticals. I will do what I can to make this project become a reality.
Though there has been recent postings on here regarding an additional team member, Adam Duzey, on this winters road trip. I have done some soul searching and have found that this undertaking needs to be done independently. I feel that this trip is an mash up of all that I have accomplished, learned to date and character values I’ve chosen to have in my life and all I wish to become in the future. I fully understand that my decision to have someone fully commit to the adventure and project, only to later sit them down and tell them that this needs to be an independent undertaking, was foolish. For me it was part of the process, and I have such a deep level of appreciation for the level of understanding that I received.
Really the sum of my fears in having another team member is that I would be limiting myself on a more personal level of growth. Granted that a two month road trip that includes snowboarding and back country winter camping in the middle of winter solo is quite possibly on of the most dangerous things a person can do, but can be countered by preparedness and networking. I have been doing some reading in Stephen R. Coveys “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”, what I have read is that an interdependent relationship with another individual (especially a road partner) can be highly beneficial, also that the worst possible thing I can do for my self is put my self in a dependent situation. Somewhere in the middle I find Independence. Without Independence you’ll never truly be of benefit to yourself or others, and really I feel a responsibility to be the best possible person I can. For myself, those I love, and those I will love.
I know for a fact I don’t want to be dependent on another, not this season, and I think that I’ll be forced into situations by myself that will require me to reach out to the community around me, to remain creative. In seasons to come I think that this epic experience with be of more value than the 2 months I will spend on the road. And also to search within myself for answers to questions regarding my personal goals and objectives, also what I value most. I believe I’ve got a better grip than most, but something about the road, the mountains, and going to do what you love for nothing more than absolute passion for it, will change a person. I’ve only experienced a taste, and I want more. I am searching to crush the old paradigms set forth by my generation and the social mirror, to search out and embody who I truly wish to be.
We are so blessed with the world we live in. Outside of all the politics that consume everyday living and an ever emproaching government, we are given the opportunity to experience the most beautiful places and environments hereon earth. As a commercial fisherman I am “overpaid” you could say. I’m not speaking of monetary compensation. I’m speaking of the experience of something greater than myself, being outdoors or having the opportunity to dive into the ocean essencially removing myself from what has become the standard human environment, my comfort zone. I am paid in beauty, awe and a great respect for things outside of myself, things beyond my scope of understanding. Granted we can almost break anything down scientifically but that wouldn’t give me the spiritual conectivity that I feel when i see scenery and majestic views such as the one depicted above. I wish that for all of us, the humbleness to truely stand in awe of the world we live in. -Shane
“These days are getting shorter and our sleeves are getting longer.” And I’m becoming more and more excited about leaving Los Angeles with each minute that crawls by. This road trip is going to change things. I’m not sure precisely WHAT it is gonna change. But everything I’ve heard in the past about epic trips like this has lead me to believe that we’re going to experience life on a whole new plain. And for me, new experience means new view.
It can be as simple as an album from a band I listen to, or as complex as learning a new trade. The things I involve in my life, change the way I look at the world.
They say that change is the only constant. All I can say is that I hope that’s a generalization. There’s one thing that I pray I hold onto forever. My drive. My enthusiasm for living my life on the “wild” side has stayed with me throughout the years and I feel like I’d be lost without it. The idea of becoming just another star, wandering through the abyss with no purpose, is repulsive. I MUST chase my dreams. No matter what the consequences may be.
Usually those consequences are found in the form of personal relationships. My friends and family who think I’m driving myself into the ground. They all “just want what’s best” for me. My question is this, how could you possibly know what’s best for me? Do you exist inside my thoughts and ideas of what “best” is? No, so miss me with that empathetic malarkey. Hahahaha! I love all of them very much, but don’t think for a millisecond that I wouldn’t burn every single one of those bridges in pursuit of my dreams.
Nothing is more important. Nothing.
November 24th we’re ghost ; )
First quote is “from autumn to ashes – daylight slavings”
Its not uncommon for our lives to become busy, overwhelming, and full of things that maintain the status quo. I’m talking about our jobs, the TV programs that we watch, the bills we have to pay, the car that we want to get. Its a sad story when our dreams and aspirations fall by the wayside, the things we want to do or the things we dream of doing seem so far out of reach because of everyday life. If you ask 10 people what they are doing with their lives and what they would rather be doing most likely 10 out of 10 will tell you that they are leading a life that is merely maintainable and has no relation to what they dream of doing. You know that one joke… come on you know it, The American Dream? What is that dream really? I’ll tell you what its not, its not a 9-5 job, its not through the roof gas prices, its not a social security system that your children probably wont see, its not 40 thousand dollars of debt. Its said that it is life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
How often is this really pursued and who’s fault is it? It starts with ourselves. Fear of failure and social acceptance is our common downfall. Its not our fault that the fear is there and when it comes to the idea of social acceptance, it is ingrained in our very being from birth. Everyone wants to be liked and accepted, its in our nature.The fear of failure comes into play when social acceptance out weighs the possibility of success. So many times, in my youth, I wanted to tell my friends about my dreams to climb the worlds tallest mountains, create a business to help others and to spread the idea of D.I.Y. ethics.
What happened is, instead, I gossiped about what other people were doing, the things I wanted to acquire, or what I may have watched on Tv the day before. The fear of social acceptability hindered the growth process, the ideas remained but did not develop and flourish. I could go on and on as to why that fear grew into an insuperable obstacle, you have to understand it wasn’t that no one wanted to listen, We we’re already being told what to think there was no time to listen! It was that there was garbage going into our brains from media and advertising, this left little space for free thought. I had the fear no one would support me or pay attention. Today I have found it doesn’t matter, there are people who will listen, support and others who will criticize. Reality is that I in and of myself can pursue what ever dream I’d like without limitation. And it is my duty, no our duty to share the ideas and tell others to pursue their own dreams without negativity. Who are we to say that it can’t be done, what are we really doing.
I wonder how many can say the same and still to this day that they have the fear of acceptance and it holds them back. The majority of individuals are so used to media, someone else doing the thinking, that there is a level of ease and comfort that comes along with it. What about the great thinkers through out history, it is a re-occurring theme that they did not agree with the social norm and sought there own answers. This meant reading, time in solitude, sometimes traveling, observing other cultures, posing questions to their peers and so on.
Now what about the people that are out pursuing their dreams today, they didn’t spend a ton of time watching TV, or buying the latest fashion. It took some effort in seeking out others that enjoyed the same sport or activity, making there own videos to share, reading about their interest and seeking out answers for questions without answers. Across the board from entrepreneurs to social activist to extreme sport professionals. Most of all it took getting out there and doing it, that is the life worth living, building from mistakes and seeking your answers.
Lets make a life worth living, and encourage or friends and family to do the same. Social acceptance only goes so far. How about that old saying “build it and they will come” build yourself and others with join you.
Think out side the box, Think Free.
Recently while driving home from Yosemite National Park, we stopped off at Mammoth Mountaineering Supply. Though the store was packed full of good stuff, tents, climbing equipment, snow equipment, avalanche gear and so on. The real gold was found on a bulletin board in the entry way to the shop. There I found a listing for a 4 season 3 man tent, and it was almost stealing with a price of $125. Granted the tent is a few years old. Retail on a similar tent is upwards of $450. The tent it a Sierra Designs 3 man, 4 season tent, super light weight and durable, excellent for any conditions under 70 mph winds. I know this because an old climbing friend had a Sierra Designs tent that I have used often. I’m really excited about the find and cant wait to use it. Sample picture below.
I here now so far from where i “was” and so far from where I’m going. Some say the path is paved, I beg to differ. The script is rewritten day to day. We are given momements and in those moments we are given the opportunity, dare i say privledge, to make a choices that will change our life journey forever. In the act of choosing we forever redirect the path, we then grow into and internalize new perspectives, smashing old paradigms and developing new more freeing attitudes and ways of acting.
My recent time in Yosemite brought me back to some thoughts and feelings i felt i had lost. The errnest desire to connect with nature, and in turn find a centeredness that is untouchable, because untouchable is something to be. To truely be at peace with ones self. For me i find it there high in the mountains, removed from the hustle and bustle of the cities. I know its inevitable that i must return to my responsibilities, but upon return there is a sense of comfort. I know i will return, I will be driven to go further, to become more in tune with my body and the physical strain that i can withstand, the mental and emotional growth that i am afforded. Its like as if you remove everything that you know as true for just a moment and are given exactly whats in front of you, at thatmoment you’ve made a deal with the universe to start over again, to hold high resolve for good and to redirect your path once again. The old paradigms are no longer set in stone and new thoughts and ideas are abundant.
I had a short convo with Adam today about what our motives and intent is with this blog. Really, what we agreed on and my firm belief is that we are simply sharing all of us with all off you. We have no reason to edit thoughts and content to cater to any one group. That would be selling ourselves short and would hinder the process. By process i’m referring to the creative process we are undertaking. Also we musttake full advantage of sharing ourselves, hardship and stuggle is part of both of our stories, should i not share that imaymiss the opportunity to relate to an individual on a more personal level on a deeper level than has already been explored. Its a resonsibility to share and grow, should we loose audience because of certain aspects, so be it, we hope that unrelateable topics can be overlooked and relateable topics taken to heart. There is love for everyone reading and when i say we only wish to pass on inspiration to one person to make the journey worth it, i am speaking from the heartand for us both.